Every cosmopolitan service? Slip the doorman a sawbuck and ask where a man could have some "fun" in town, and see how broadly they define "every."

The Dacotah looks like Scrooge McDuck's bank vault; the modernization seems to have been utterly pitiless. It once looked like this:

But that was before the Age of Bacon. It looks like this now. Time has been pitiless.