Meet the group! Slumming rich kid! Dude with a hairy back! Sexless runt who exists as the pity object for the unattractive female readers! Avaricious dead-eyed white-haired mutant!

Note: the drummer, who was normal sized and not entirely without charisma on the cover, is actually a tiny Paul-WIlliams-sized hunchback who plays scale models of early telecommunications satellites.

It’s surely a complete accident that the lyrics can be sung to the Monkees’ theme song.