Today: a look at a West German prefab disco girl group. Finally, you say. Whatever has been keeping you?

Look, it’s possible that we’ve just run out of things to discuss.

Kidding. We will never run out of things to discuss. So:

Arabesque are an all-girl trio formed at the height of the European disco era in 1977, in the West German city of Frankfurt. The group's changing lineup worked with the German composer Jean Frankfurter (Erich Ließmann).

Arabesque were especially popular in Japan.

Ah, the old cliche.

1975: “A Brit (Karen Ann Tepperis), a German-Mexican (Michaela Rose), and a German (Mary Ann Nagel) comprised the initial group.”

They rotated through a lot of singers. The big break came when they had an “overnight success” with “Hello Mr. Monkey” . . . in Japan, so off they went to tour.

After that, more international success! To be specific:

Arabesque became extremely popular in Japan and South Korea, and also had success in the USSR and the Eastern Bloc.

Let's look at the album covers. It's a brisk and efficient tour of the aesthetics of the era. We begin with an absolut mess, and a logo in a popular typeface that would look passe and discoesque within a few years.

1979 Very late-70s / early 80s - the harsh lurid flash

1980 No photography studio was complete without a fan

1980 The girl-group equivalent of Spinal Tap’s Jazz Odyssey switch-up

1981 I know tastes change, and eras often look odd in retrospect, but this is objectively some of the worst fashion I’ve ever seen.

1982: Background is very 80s, because it has Shapes and then it also has Other Shapes.

1982: The one on the right chloroformed her daughter so she could take her place, and she’s nervous she’ll be found out

1983: We are SO JEALOUS ABBA had that hit, “Winner Takes It All.” We’ll show them!

1984: It had been proven that West Germany had run out of women to swap into the group, and so . . .

I know you’ve been waiting for it. Ladies and Gentlemen: that Monkey song.

I wonder if they meant a lot to a few, or meant just . . . something, to a lot.

L’Erin.

Nobody doesn’t like . . . L’Erin?

There’s a frankness to this that’s very 70s: the mod and now woman who is assured, engaged, effortlessly beautiful, and her Own Person.

She looks as if she’s standing in a hole:

Right, right - kissing booths! I’d forgotten about those. I’ve never seen one. They’re appalling to modern sensibilities. All that disease! Strangers! Subservience! Entry-level sex work!

Another in the compare-and-contrast series:

An entirely different approach, which takes the brand in a different direction:

Mystery and intrigue:

This site says L’Erin was a spin-off of L’eggs, and was originally called “L’aura.” (And Sara Lee owned L’eggs. Because that made perfect sense.)

L'erin was trying to be simpler and more practical, aiming for the young, active woman who wanted less drama and fuss in their makeup kits. But being sold primarily in supermarkets and discount stores (this wasn't exactly Estee Lauder), the cosmetically savvy ladies just weren't impressed. They viewed L'erin as cheap and chintzy.

And it was. The makeup quality itself was also notorious, as millions of raccoon-eyed girls staring back from their '80s high school yearbooks can testify. The mascara was clumpy right out of the bottle, the eyeliner and eye shadow ran under hot lights or in the hot sun. By this time, boys were getting into makeup (the Duran Duran thing and the first wave of glam metal had hit) and I remember girls experimenting on us with their once-used L'erin cosmetics.

You know, I was around when there was The Duran Duran Thing and I don't remember guys getting into makeup. Probably a highschool thing.

That'll do. Tomorrow? You won't believe it! No, actually, I'm sure you will.