I’ve been doing this since 1996, and I’m still stunned at some of the things I see. Meatballs in Pink Sauce. Good Lord. It’s the diluted chili sauce that gives the dish its regrettable hue, I think. If you really wanted to freak people out, you’d serve a whipped Jell-O with an identical color for dessert.

Below the Pink Balls (is that what Tomboys get when they’re frustrated?) you’ll find Chopped-Off Alien Fetus Pods, and that all-American favorite, Unnaturally Bright Spaghetti with Half-Digested Gut Chunks. Dig in!