You don’t say, Master Luke. So that’s what the giant silver sphere is, eh? Well, if it’s the Death Star, which we know is a horrid machine capable of demolishing planets with a single blast, we’d better hurry.

Oh, wait: Mr. Bright Side’s waving us off. Apparently WE’RE FINISHED.

This “serialization” of Star Wars was obviously intended to strike while the iron was hot – the iron would not cool for decades, but they didn’t know that. So we have cover blurbs like “Luke Skywater strikes again,” which suggests he’s some sort of trans-galactic Robin Hood, a fellow of storied exploits. It’s not as if he’s done a hell of a lot of striking up to know. His striking days are still ahead. His hair is confused – long and blonde in the upper left-hand corner, long and brown below. Doesn’t look like Mark Hamill at all. For that matter, we all know the Death Star didn’t attack like this. Didn’t need to. Best part: this particular chapter, in true Marvel style, is called “Lo, the Moons of Yavin.” Given that “Alice” was still on the air, it’s a good thing they didn’t spoonerize that one. Yo indeed! And kiss my grits.

You get a sense of the quality in this excerpt.

Han Solo actually calls himself “erstwhile” in his internal dialogue, and Princess Leia begins to feel the faint stirrings of hope – which, naturally, she keeps to herself, lest she encourage anyone.