We say goodbye to our intrepid band of sleuths and sleuth-assistants with another indistinguishable episode in the continuing saga of one man's attempt to use crime to avoid getting married. But the wedding is only hours away, which may explain the title:
It begins in Scotland Yard, where an inspector has handed a clipping from the paper. It’s announcing National Annual Look Over There Day:
Yes, Bulldog and Miss Clavering are finally getting married so she can be good and truly Clavered, and he can settle into the quiet life of a Swiss gentlemen, waiting for WW2 so he can defeat the Nazi war machine with the help of his butlerTenny and addlepated friend, Algae. Seriously, he’s in Switzerland. You can tell because the color scheme is antiseptic and neutral.
The wedding gifts are arriving, as well as the guests. One fellow might as well be introduced as The Chap With No Obvious Connection to Any of This, and Hence Your Criminal Element for the Next 67 Minutes.
He’s the head of diamond syndicate, and naturally he reacts with alarm when he sees Algae’s gift: it’s a new kind of manufactured diamond. Naturally, he’ll have to KILL EVERYONE to steal it, because that’s how you stop a chemist in the UK from destroying your entire industry: a high-profile murder resulting in the lost of one example of the manufacturing process. Oh, and after you’ve killed the policeman guarding the wedding loot, leave the party.
Algae and wife also give the couple a penguin, for comic relief. As a gift. Picture someone showing up at your wedding and giving you a penguin. It would be up all night screaming in the bathtub.
After the murder is discovered, we leave the spacious confines of the Claveringinglesquely Villa and return to the familiar, thrilling confines of a frickin’ train car. Just as we did in the first Bulldog we saw. It’s all coming full circle. Of course, this is the train car containing Sir Raymond, the Diamond Syndicate chap, and when he spots Bulldog he knocks on his cabin door to ask what he’s doing on the train. Weren’t you supposed to be getting married? Bulldog, apparently keen for any excuse to escape the teethy horror of his wedding night and hang out with the lads, has a little chat with the fellow in the remarkably spacious “vestibule” of the train, where they are suddenly drawn into the life-sucking vortex of a massive, unicellular space-borne organism:
There’s a thrilling flying sequence, as Bulldog races back to England to detain the villain, his complete and utter lack of police powers notwithstanding. He has to deal with the air traffic control system of the era, which was nothing if not dramatically lit:
We’re treated to a lengthy demonstration of how the diamonds are made, and it goes without saying that SPARKS are involved.
On it goes; the last half hour is the usual chase from set to set. Tenny, the elderly butler, ends up going after the bad guys on a motorcycle, leading to an FX sequence as good as they could afford.
In the end, I’m actually glad I watched these; it was fun to spend time in the company of these guys for the last six weeks.
And I’ll never watch any of them again. They didn’t get married in this one, either. I’m beginning to think this was a running gag. Which would also be a description of Bulldog's reaction when his new bride disrobed and he realized what he would be called upon to do, unless he fled, making sounds of distress. Come now, old chap. Think of England.