And I am SPENT.
After I finished a vidcast I hung up the Skype, took off the headphones, picked up the phone, did a radio interview – then bolted out the door to get some things for my daughter’s birthday party. She doesn’t want much. No long list this year, no Webkinz or any other pointless collectibles. Mostly, money. Better yet: Amazon money. I figured I’d pick up a gift card at Walgreen’s. They have cards for everything!8888Except Amazon. Well, I will print one out using a custom background, so all will be fine. Went to Target to get a DS Pokemon game that’s totally different from all the other Pokemon games, with the exception of being identical in every possible way.
Daughter came home from camp today, excited about seeing the results of an online animation competition. I went into her room to see how she was doing; her head was down. She didn’t win. “I’m okay,” she said, but I could tell she wasn’t. Tears were the first clue. Parents pick up on these things. We had a talk, and of course I doled out the useless bromides, a mixture of consolation and inspiration – but what’s the alternative? Art will always be subjectively evaluated, and everyone’s a critic. The critics even more so. I suggested she email the person who ran the contest and thank her for the chance to enter – and she did, which gave me a warm glow. Soon she got emails from the other contest winners, encouraging her and giving kudos for her entry. Given the general level of sociopathy on the web, that’s nice – and it turned a dark afternoon into what it should be: the last day of being Nine on a sunny summer day in the best place ever, her home, her room.
Although tonight her room is occupied by Grandma. This was a surprise – we thought she was staying at another daughter’s tonight, but I came outside between interviews and hey presto, there she was in the gazebo with suitcases. I did an actual double-take. You don’t know if that’s hard-coded in the human brain, or you’re just channeling sitcoms. Did people in Rome do spit-takes? Did cavemen say “wahh-wahh-wahh-wahhhhh” when something ended up wacky yet awry, even though horns had not been invented? Even primitive man must have had comedy – but I suppose that means someone had to be the first. Someone grunted the equivalent of “Hunter, Moon-Talker, and Fire-maker walk into a cave.” The first joke. I’d bet the first act of comedy was someone pretending to be a fearsome beast to amuse the kids, making them squeal with delight and delicious fake fear. I’ll go out on a limb and say that the person who invented comedy was a dad.
Since she was exiled from her room tonight, she spent the night on the floor of my studio drawing and doing collaborative sketches on the internet while I worked on the various things. Tomorrow’s her birthday, and she’s a bit blase about it: fun, yes, of course, ice cream and pizza, but the days of ENORMOUS PRODUCTIONS are over. No Princess-themed bouncy in the backyard. She’s going to the humane society for her birthday, and the kids have been asked to bring gifts for the animals, which makes me inordinately proud. All I have to do tomorrow is remember to get the cake. I’d called the grocery store to see if they could do anime characters, and they said they had a limited number of licensed characters they could do. Because you have to pay fees if you have a copyrighted character. But the bakery lady made it sound like they had a generic anime character, and while that could be good, you never know – so I went to check. It was Ben 10. Oh my no.
We went with balloons. And now I have to wrap presents. A wonderful day ahead tomorrow.
So! Links.
100 Mysteries.
Gallery of Regrettable Food: covers – remember, clicking on the image takes you to the next one.
Gallery of Regrettable Food: Outdoor cooking (redesigned site.)
Annnnd tumbler and Popcrush – with a noontime video – and Ricochet (warning! Craaaaazy insane center-right political discussions) and a column. Oy. Gevalt. Thanks for stopping by – see you Monday!
Oh, one more thing. A postcard I picked up last week. I defy anyone to tell me who these guys are. Or why they mattered. Or what they did. Even knowing the answers, I couldn’t tell you. Good luck!
Pass it along, if you wish
74 Responses to Ten Years On.
Host with the Most
Many happy returns of the day to Natalie. On the occasion of such a significant milestone, we are reminded of the observation of Bartholomew J. Simpson: “Everything changes when you hit the big one-oh. Your legs start to go, candy doesn’t taste as good any more…Sorry, this old-timer does ramble on sometimes, don’t he?”
_@_v – posts seem to be going down the memory hole… so if three of the same thing show up years later…
I join with other readers in wishing Natalie a very HAPPY BIRTHDAY!! I have a niece who’s 13 and a nephew who turns 13 next month, and it has been a wonder and a joy to watch them grow up into terrific people. And, at a great distance, all of us are having that pleasure watching Natalie grow as well.
I also loved the paragraph reflecting on the origin of comedy– then again, considering the history of comedy in this country, you wonder whether it started way back when with the pre-exilic Hebrews.
Your postcard fellers are, of course, Lum and Abner, radio and film luminaries for over twenty years, and they’re in front of the Jot-’Em Down Store in Pine Ridge, Arkansas, which they ran.
If you really don’t know them (I don’t believe you; you know everything, as the birthday girl will tell you — until in two or three years she begins to tell you that you know nothing), you should download a few of their shows. It’s a long-gone era of gentle comedy, with rarely a guffaw but often a chuckle.
Happy birthday to Natalie!
My young one is 5, and I often lament the loss of time with regards to her! James, you continue to amuse me with tales of what I might expect in years to come. I hope I can do half the job you’ve clearly done as a dad.
Boy, the years have not been kind to Bartles and Jaymes!
@Pencilpal: Caesar doing a spit take- how about Caesar cracking jokes? Obligatory SCTV link: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RfI_ZTIhBrw&feature=PlayList&p=3DBAE5D7A0CF31A9&playnext=1&index=17
Let me add my wishes for a Fantastic Birthday to Natalie! She has a lot of fans out here in Internet-Land. Great to hear of all her interests and talents. I hope she knows she has a daddy that is one of a kind, and who has folks all around the world thinking good thoughts of her and sending positive waves in her direction!
Regarding pancakes with ‘outdoor goodness’. My family had a 25′ camper permanently parked at a campground on the Tippecanoe River in Indiana. With the very cramped kitchen we cooked almost all of our food outdoor over a campfire.
Perhaps it was my imagination, but just about anything mom made seemed to taste better when cooked over the campfire. This is not to say her food wasn’t good otherwise, mom (and dad) were great cooks. But something about bacon and pancakes cooked in the cast iron skillet over the campfire just tasted better.
I neglected to wish Natalie happy birthday, so: happy birthday Natalie! You sound like a great kid.
MLN84: You think that a child of James Lilieks doesn’t know who Ensign Wesley Crusher is?
“…the days of ENORMOUS PRODUCTIONS are over.”
Yeah, right. Check back with us in six years.
_@_v – toasted luckys ad looks like zeppelin passengers looking down on kansas
StroNheim?
Looks like Max von Mayerling was moonlighting in vaudeville for some extra cash. Wonder if Norma Desmond knew what was going on.
(\__/)
(=’.'=) ˜ i˜i˜i˜i˜i˜i˜i˜i˜i˜i – mew! happy birthday natalie!
(“)_(“)[?????????????]
I know you went with balloons, but there’s still time.
If you take in any picture, most cake places will scan it for you into their scanner-frosting-printer, and “print it out” onto the cake.
So you could take in one of HER pictures, and they’d do it for that.
Target and Byerly’s should both be able to do this, even on short notice (like 20 minutes.)
“Older Comments” link is visible but un-clickable; the top comment box is lying on top of it – both with Safari and Firefox.
Lum and Abner is my vote also! Happy Birthday to Natalie! Future Pixar animator!
browniejr: Hilarious! I think Eugene Levy was channeling Sid Caesar, not Julius.
Did cavemen say “wahh-wahh-wahh-wahhhhh” when something ended up wacky yet awry, even though horns had not been invented?
Oh, I’m pretty sure that horns had been invented, but it was rather difficult to detach them from the ram who owned them.
@tterrace: I actually get two “older comments” boxes–one at the top that doesn’t work, and another at the bottom that does. (BTW, I love your contributions to Shorpy!)
Happy birthday, Natalie!
Happy birthday to Natalie! Ten was the best; I can’t think of anything better than going back and being ten again. Like Lucinda Wyman of “Roller Skates,” I would have loved to stay ten forever.
OTR-wise I prefer “The Shadow” and “Fibber McGee and Molly.”
@Kev: Oh… ah… hem… there it is, just a couple inches up from here. Well. Thanks. And thanks for the Shorpy compliment.
I accept your challenge!
From the top row, left to right: Engelbert Humperdinck, Lorreta Lynn, Merle Haggard; Anne Murray; Conway Twitty; Diane Warwick; Glen Campbell, Carole King, Tom Jones; Burt Bacharach; Victor Borge, Neil Diamond, Elton John
(and Happy Birthday, Natalie!)
@NEokie: That’s Mantovani, not Victor Borge.
James, I thought you might be interested in these color photos from ’39 – ’43
http://blogs.denverpost.com/captured/2010/07/26/captured-america-in-color-from-1939-1943/?source=ARK_plog