Tuesday, August 04
Sitting outside in a different chair. Not the usual writing chair. It’s wet. I’ve been watering the lawn this evening; I have two chika-chika sprinklers connected to a single hose, and between the two of them they get about 70 percent of the yard. Which means I have to set them up again for the other 30 percent, adjust the pattern and the distance. You really don’t know how it’s going to work until you turn on the water; you make adjustments, and go about your business. But sometimes it’s easy to mistake the settings, so they’re the exact opposite of where you think they are. So it was: I turned on the water, and saw Sprinkler #1 shoot a big fat gout of water into the gazebo. Time slowed. I knew there was no way to turn off the water before it hit the laptop.
Or the book.
Ah, but if I turn off the water now, I can make it to the laptop before the sprinkler comes ‘round again. Or not? Should I not bolt for the laptop and cut off the water later? I don’t remember what I did; I just remember standing outside my body, seeing my horrified expression as the water hit the laptop. But it was closed.
Because, you see, I’m smart. Knowing the water might hit the gazebo, I’d closed the laptop.
As opposed to just moving it.
Idiot.
Well, it’s fine. The book’s shiny cover was easily wiped, and the pages didn’t get drenchenated, so we’re all good on all counts, except for the chair. I have a new view, and frankly I don’t know why I don’t sit here all the time. I can see the Oak Island Water Feature, the water flowing down the stones. Soon the lights will click on, illuminating the cascade from below. Perfect summer night.
Perfect summer day, too. Good news: the movie in which your host had a starring role, if you define “starring” as “one of the last persons seen in film, and only then if you’re on some sort of cinematic scavenger hunt that includes noticing overhead shots of someone sitting in a church pew with his bald spot on display, has been picked up for distribution. I discussed this last summer when it was shot, and earlier this year when it was premiered. A friend wrote & directed it; his wife produced; since we have kids in the same circle, Natalie was enlisted for a First Communion scene. Russell Hosapple, the fellow whose symphony premiered at Minnesota Youth Symphony years ago – another ancient Bleat buried in the archives – did the score. As the imdb page notes, it has some fine, fine talent, including Kevin from “The Office.” To complete the circle: I’ll be blurbed on the posters and DVD box. Hah! First time. And this should be a new expression of surprise: Well, I’ll be blurbed.
Just remembered something I have been meaning to blurb, but haven’t. Crap. Well. It’s been that sort of summer, and I’m hoping to dig out in the next two weeks. You cannot imagine what my studio looks like now – the end of the great final scanning project is underway, with boxes and boxes and reams and reams fed to the whining machinery. Six years of reader contributions, finally digitized.
By some odd coincidence it coincides with my wife’s command to DO SOMETHING about the boxes heaped in the storage room.
I will meet October with a great weight off my chest. I will meet December with the novel mostly done. In between now and then I just want to be happy and content and useful. The last two weeks have been a bit unfortunate, with the Black Dog prowling and growling in the bushes outside the reach of the campfire light; I just lost enthusiasm for my enthusiasms. I think it’s lifted. The worst thing about Depression isn’t the sense that you’re ac-centuating the negative, it’s that you’re seeing things the way they really are, stripped of the illusions you use every day to divert yourself from the Yawning Maw of Futility. It’s the wind that blows off the snow and reveals the stone.
This is an appalling story: British authorities, to use two words that nowadays seem to suggest power unmoored from reason and abetted by weary, deafeated indifference, will install cameras in the homes of bad parents:
The Children’s Secretary set out £400million plans to put 20,000 problem families under 24-hour CCTV super-vision in their own homes.
They will be monitored to ensure that children attend school, go to bed on time and eat proper meals.
Well. I’m sure there’s more to this than the article suggests, but the one thing missing, as far as I can tell, is any discussion whatsoever of the legal basis for this. I mean, it can’t be mandatory. They’re not that far gone. It wouldn’t surprise you if they are mandatory, but even if they are, I can see some of the people making a lark of it: it’s just like being on Big Brother. I suppose the way to get the real Big Brother is to train people to volunteer for it on television; makes it easier to sell them the home-game version, as they used to call it.
Also from the article:
Mr Balls also said responsible parents who make sure their children behave in school will get new rights to complain about those who allow their children to disrupt lessons.
There’s a bonanza crop of official dysfunction in that sentence. First of all: parents will get new rights to complain. This suggests that the previous rights were constrained somehow; this suggests that the state grants, in its theoretically infinite benevolence, the right to complain in the first place. Or rather the state admits that it has some responsibility to follow up on the complaints not dealt with the last time rights were kindly granted.. What new rights? Were people previously enjoined from making the case that a disruptive student should be disciplined or expelled, because it violated the rights of the child? “New rights to complain,” you suspect, means little more than a new set of procedures, each with their own benchmarks and standards and timetables.
Of course, the problem is school itself, since it’s full of shrieking headmasters badgering sensitive children with the great unanswered question of British education: how can you have any pudding if you haven’t eaten your meat? Remember one of the grievances put forth by Roger Waters in “Another Brick in the Wall” – dark sarcasm in the classroom.
Teacher! Leave those kids alone!
Seems they got their wish.
Later today: Comic Sins, of course; B&W World Summer Sci-Fi Drive-in Edition. And the new blog here and there. Do visit – it’s not local like buzz.mn, not entirely. It’s what I would do here if I was paid to write this all day. Strib blog with Post Office story right now. See you soon.
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[...] And speaking of video, in Airstrip One, the installation of two-way telescreens proceeds apace. [...]
Hmm – a busted link to the Blog O’ Things.
Should be
http://www.startribune.com/blogs/lileks.html
not
http://www.startribune.com/blogs/lileks/html
Kind of like all those busted links in the Diner Archives.
Heh heh… Mr. Balls.
Your summing up of “British authorities” hits it right on the button. My only consolation is that I’ve never voted for this appalling government.
I think it’s ungood that only a few homes are getting the Telescreen. How can the rest properly praise Big Brother?
I wonder how many people in this country have a problem with the idea of government “giving rights” to citizens? How many realize just how poisonous a notion that is?
““giving rights” to citizens? How many realize just how poisonous a notion that is?”
dittos
My guess is that the families voluntarily submitted to the cameras as an alternative to what was probably the LEGAL remedy– throwing the parents in jail for being losers, or taking the kids away from them. I’ve heard of a few cases similar in our own country– kid wears a sandwich board proclaiming that he’s a thief, DUI, or whatever, instead of 30 days in the hole.
I always like it when I leave the Bleat with a boost to my vocabulation. My family doesn’t appreciate my own attempts at expanding the lexicon by adding words that should rightfully already exist, but tough.
One last thing– this is the second “news” instance I have read lately of someone in the UK named Balls. Must not be that uncommon over there, and probably doesn’t have the same, sneering connotation. Now, if he had been named Mr. Bollocks…
Wow…Simply…wow. But after the last 6-12 months of hopiness and change, I’m not surprised. I think the desensitization waves coming from the TV for the last 30 years are having their effect…
This has been a spooky, spooky year. It even gave me a brain tumor (no really, I’m having it removed on Monday, granted that the Controlling Legal Authority allows it).
I quit telling myself that it will get better about a year ago. All I have to absolutely believe in is how well I raise MY kids…
JtP, good luck, etc. I know someone who had a good-sized brain tumor removed more than fifteen years ago & he is still going strong.
Boy, there’s a whole semester’s worth of discussion fodder in that story, not the least of which is the distinction between constitutions that grant rights and those that guarantee rights. Sorry if this reminds any of you that the new school year looms.
Joe the Painter: After they sell off all your STUFF, about the only thing left really is how well you raised your kids. I hope the sale is a LONG, Long time from now, O’care not withstanding.
From the article: “This is pretty tough and non-negotiable support for families to get to the root of the problem.”
Because government solves everything! They’ll get to the root of the problem and solve it for you, you worthless, flawed human-type!
I understand offering drug and alcohol counseling, but seriously — surveillance? Being babysat by private security guards? Scary.
Of course, the problem is school itself, since it’s full of shrieking headmasters badgering sensitive children with the great unanswered question of British education:
The real question of British Education being; how do you handle dead rodents without subjecting yourself to balloon hands and a fevered, psychedelic dream?
Bonus exit question: Manscaping – hard core, copious bloodletting style as depicted by Sir Bob Geldof in the film, or with the new swishy fancy-boy appliances available to modern day swells?
My answer – I just don’t need to know.
Oh the linkie to the Blog O’ Things is fubarred should be —http://www.startribune.com/blogs/lileks.html
But then, I’ve never made a typing error. Ever. In my life…
Don’t flirt with Depression. Don’t look for meaning in your hobbies first. All the meaning you need is in how you take care of your family & friends. Once you have that straight, you just may be able to see the meaning in your documentary avocations and in things like the Bleat, which bring cheer to many thousands of people daily. So count your blessings. Seriously. Do this as a nightly exercise whenever the Black Dog growls. Then cowboy up and remember that the only sin God has a hard time forgiving is ingratitude. There’s a whole world of new enthusiams to embrace if the ones you’ve had for years begin to pall. And remember that although your readers will never physically share a scotch and a small cigar in your gazebo, we do care, and we don’t like to see that you’ve been musing about futility. Tails up, man, and scan that next box!
Despite the myth of polite, inhibited Britain, it seems like they’ve really been trying to cope with a growing chav culture; witness the creation of the ASBO order (yes, I know, that’s like “ATM machine”); teachers are regularly assaulted by studens, and public drunkenness is a growing problem. I blame the overly generous dole system; it sometimes seems, at least according to my friends Over There, that signing on for benefits is more or less seen as a legitimate career choice. Remember this is coming from a Canadian, so I’m already a bleeding socialist.
And yes, “Balls” does mean the same there as here.
Not surprised about the CCTV in the homes in Britain. Seems like the whole country is under closed circuit, mainly outdoors for “crime prevention” and ID suspects. It is really scary sounding.
…weird, where’d my comment go?!
…Anyway, what I was trying to say was that Britain seems to be trying to cope with chav culture, and despite the myth of quiet, inhibited Brits they’re having a really hard time curbing antisocial behaviour. I would partially blame the breathtaking ease of getting the dole; it seems to me that signing up for benefits is more or less seen as a legit career choice these days. This is coming from a Canadian, btw, so I’m already pretty comfortable with ’socialism’
but even I think it’s appalling at how easy it is to wring money out of the system.
My wife’s purse was snatched on the high street in Nottingham a couple of years ago. When she found a PC and reported the theft, she pointed out that it was taken in full view of one of the “security” cameras and the police should have seen the criem. The PC said, in effect, “You think we have people & time to watch all those things?” Never did see any results. Love the UK but the government is going insane.
This is on a part with the 22-year-old alcoholic who was denied a liver transplant and died recently (rather than provide a link and send the post into moderation, just google “Britain alcoholic denied liver transplant”).
This is where Obama wants us to go.
On the other hand, under that standard, David Crosby would have been denied one, and that would have taken care of any potential CS&N albums, so it would have had its good points as well.
active drug abusers getting transplants? that does not compute. I may be a card-carrying, banner-waving capital-L Liberal, but folks, that does not compute. that’s like a government bailout of Bernie Madoff or Tom Petters, Ponzi artists supreme.
some folks deserve a hand up.
some folks deserve to be slapped silly.
Serious-ish: Not much to add to what others have said. I have often commented to my wife that I think Britain is headed to revolution.
Funny-ish: The name “Balls” does make this sound like a parody. I remember a character in a Inspector Clouseau film with the name Balls and he ran a shop and there was a fire so they had a sale. The joke was some play on “The Great Balls Fire Sale.”
And I would like to be the one to do it. It would be great therapy all around.
@swschrad: The argument is not that alcoholics do or don’t deserve liver transplants, but that it is a sign of creeping totalitarianism for a national government to even be making that determination.
Also, not to put any further pressure on the already kaleidoscopically-refracted output of Our Good Host, but isn’t this last point of the post Screedblog material?
I was gonna be an extra in that movie, too… in the coffee shop scene – but they filmed it at 3am instead of the afternoon!
Nevertheless, I will rent it to catch a glimpse of yours truly!
What if. . .all those reality shows — The Real World, Big Brother, Last Survivor, Kate & Jon, etc. — were really a secret government plot to slowly get the sheeple accustomed to 24-hour government survelliance? Scary, dude!
My favorite transplant story was the time my wife and I went to a local dinner fundraiser. The place was crowded and we were seated at a table with a couple we had not met before. The husband went on and on about his recent heart/lung transplant. I remarked that he looked rather well. He thanked me, then pushed back from the table and fired up an after-dinner cigarette.
Oh James. Always save the Laptop…
after losing 2 electrical conveniences, 1 laptop and 1 cell phone, to water in a month. I say always save the laptop. It’s better than forking over the money for a new one.
How about the patient who died here in the good ol’ USA last week who was denied a liver transplant by Cigna because his cancer had gone out of remission? What’s the difference between possibly dying of cancer or possibly dying of an alcohol related condition? Is Cigna a socialist program or a corporate for profit insurance company? Confused? You should be. At least the English lad hadn’t been paying premiums all his life before his healthcare provider pulled his plug.
David Crosby got a transplant not because he had insurance but because he could afford to pay for the surgery (or pay for insurance that would cover it – very few of us have that type of coverage), could afford get on all the lists and fly anywhere, anytime, as soon as one was available. If that alcoholic in England were that rich, he’d have gotten his liver too, because they do have private healthcare there, and it is probably cheaper because it isn’t subsidizing all the malfeasance running rampant in our system.
I read a different story, and it implied that the 20K homes were all council flats, aka “the projects” as we know them here.
I believe the US is the only country where the citizens have inalienable rights. The rights are not granted by the government as are those of our friends in the UK so greatly enjoy.
“Don’t flirt with Depression.” Well meant, but when the black dog comes, there’s no flirting at all. You just turn around or wake up and there he is on your chest, refusing to be ignored.
On a semi-lighter note, it’s interesting that the Pink Floyd song is still relevant, maybe even more so today than when first recorded. And I think it’s time to watch “Brazil” again. Nothing to do with British education, but everything to do with government meddling.
On the other hand, with a VERY limited supply of transplant organs and a lengthy list of potential recipients, doesn’t it make sense to have a central agency that controls the process to (theoretically) ensure fairness? Everybody with non-self inflicted liver didease got their transplant? Great, now you can get yours.
Why is everyone taking the Daily Express seriously on the matter of CCTV? Because its masthead says it’s the “World’s Greatest Newspaper”? Or because British tabloids’ reputation for straightforward, accurate reporting? Appalling if true, but if it had been reported by the National Enquirer, would we be so eager to believe it?
Shortly before dirt was invented I took a Constitutional Law course. IIRC, under the English system all rights are exclusive to the Crown. If His Majesty, The Queen, grants his subjects rights, these are written into laws, rules and a double ‘elpin of regulations. So the statement that other parents could be granted rights for additional complaints is correct. Under our system, so far and in spite of the Obahmessiah, rights are exclusive to the people. Our rights can be limited by legislation only if the limits do not conflict with the supreme law of the U.S. – the Constitution.
All of that is a simple statement of a simple person. I could go on and on and on because it’s a really complicated subject about which we’ve been arguing for over 300 years. Let’s hope we keep arguing for another 3,000 years, Uff Da!!
@D Palmer: I’m hardly an expert, but a quick bit of wiki-fu points me to the United Network for Organ Sharing seems to be the sort of central clearinghouse for organ donation you have in mind. It was established by Congress in 1984 but seems to be free of government control, unlike the NHS. Again, I’m not an expert, but the point is that you can manage organ transplants without giving draconian control to the government.
This story regarding CCTV in private homes appeared in the Daily Express, which means it is probably bollocks.
“So the statement that other parents could be granted rights for additional complaints is correct.”
Only for certain values of “correct”.
If the government can give it, they can take it away. If they grant it to you, you’ve received a privilege. (And they can be taken away, no matter what you might wish.)
Our Bill of Rights recognizes limits placed on the government’s power to infringe its citizens’ inherent rights. Those rights are protected, not granted.
Very different things.
Okay, so my first post didn’t make the cut. Briefly, people with pre-existing conditions get turned down by private insurance companies for transplants over here too, see: Nataline Sarkisyan. To imply that they do not, and that it is strictly the provenance of socialized medicine is misleading. Unless you think an alcoholic’s life is somehow more precious than a cancer survivor’s.
Here is the link to the U.K.’s Department for Children, Schools and Families. I Searched through the list of 2009 news releases and could find nothing to corroborate the ‘CCTV in private homes’ story:
http://www.dcsf.gov.uk/index.htm
Every hit on the story eventually leads back to one and only source, the Daily Express.
Sorry to hear that the past two weeks have been prudish for you JL. Glad you’re back up on the horse. Do not despair-we are a faithful audience, in spite of any drooling black dog. We would indeed share a good cigar with you in the gazebo,but Jasper can be the only dog in attendance. Chip up!
What @KellyH and @steveH said. In the UK, the monarch holds all rights and deigns to dole some out to the people, and may take them back. In the US, the people hold all rights and have granted a few, enumerated rights to the government, through the Constitution.
Of course, ninety-five percent (an estimate — so sue me) of the what the federal government does are things it has not been given the right to do. I blame this state of affairs on the Seventeenth Amendment, which took away the sovereign states’ representation in the federal government.
“What @KellyH and @steveH said. In the UK, the monarch holds all rights and deigns to dole some out to the people, and may take them back…”
Yes, that’s a pretty little fiction to make the “We’re Number One! We’re Number One!” mouth-breathers feel better, but anyone who didn’t sleep through all of their history classes knows that the Brits already had a civil war about that particular point–and the Crown _lost_. It’s called a “constitutional monarchy” because the monarch, while the head of state(the ceremonial aspect of gov’t), may only suggest, _not_ command. Nothing happens under British law w/o Parliament or the sitting gov’t(w/the PM as its head). Short of what’s left of the British military dropping acid and mounting a coup to erase The Glorious Revolution, it’s just as much a representative democracy as any other Western state.
Now, if you want to substitute “the gov’t” for “the monarch” in those statements, you’d be close to the mark.
[...] Lileks, Bleat, 2009-08-04 Comments [...]