You may be fat when you board but by the time you get to Jamaica you'll be in better shape.

Anyone believe that? No. Anyone care? Doubtful.

The Santa Paula, built in 1958, "was one of the last US-flagged ocean liners ever built." In one of the more bizarre twists in cruise-ship history, the vessel was damanged during the Iraqi occupation of Kuwait. Because it was a hotel. Embedded in a fake berth.

It was a Ramada.